Never Ending Poop Saga

Now that the excavator showed up and dug up our sewer line one would think that my poop lifestyle would finally come to a reprieve. Unfortunately, I have no such luck.
After the excavator left, my husband mentioned he had chatted with him briefly about the septic tank. It appears that (behind my back) the dude mentioned to my husband that the entrance to our septic was jammed with a "kotex like material". WTF does that imply?
Am I so stupid (being the sole female in the household) to not know that after 9 years of living with a septic system I should not flush a giant maxi pad down the toilet?? Doesn't every woman on earth know not to do such a thing? (Even in a city system.) Did we have crazy guests over just itching to dispose of their feminine products down our country toilet??? Or do imps and gnomes show up and flush kotex down my toilet? What could this "product" really be?

Luckily the power went out due to a windstorm that knocked the neighbors tree down--distracting me from fuming about the sexist assumption that women screw up septic systems...So we took the dogs to the "self-serve dog wash"--a popular thing in Alaska instead of fancy groomers. Two hours later the beasts were brushed and clean. Unfortunately the dogs don't think of this as clean--they think of it as "odor vulnerable" or something like that.
The first thing they do at home is try to rub their necks in dirt (I have been told that is where the scent glands are). We steered them away from this activity, and they spent the night smelling like spring breezes and sunshine.
Of course the following day, they had had enough and sensed their canine opportunity when I opened the front door--sprinting past me in a mad gallop...heading for the hills. I can never stop the 120 pounds of determined muscle when they decide to knock me over and run away. I had a good idea where they were heading though--the neighbors house.
Sure enough, they returned only 20 minutes later, and Dingbat was covered with a yellow substance--horse manure. She just had to roll in horse manure...! That will show us to stop trying to get away from our poop-centric lifestyle...good grief, it's my calling.