So I woke up with a terrible allergic reaction--sneezing, coughing, runny nose. Running the potential allergen checklist off in my head (pollen, cats, and avocado) I deduced none of these substances could possibly be in my bedroom.
Sneezing away, I had the unfortunate urge to open up the bedroom curtains. And to my horror--came face to face with my new September allergen: SNOW!
White, fluffy snow. And no matter what they say on the radio about it "not accumulating" those newscasters are full of crap. It is totally accumulating in my yard. On the trees, cars, deck--all looks like a freakin Christmas card...
I wonder why all those people with their "think snow" bumper stickers don't move on up to Alaska and see for themselves what 9 months of snow feels like??!! We had three snow free months in my back yard this year--June, July and August. And the frozen white stuff still sat up in the high peaks and mocked me throughout one of the warmest summers in Alaskan history! And thank goodness for that record breaking summer heat, because otherwise I just may have packed up and left my poor family behind....
ps-- I am in no way denying climate change at all--as I completely understand this is the change we get--increased cold precipitation soaking our soggy northern selves! arghhhh!
.
Monday, September 23, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Attention Tooth Fairy
Time magazine recently wrote a little piece about how much cash the honorable Tooth Fairy deposits under children's pillows. I was shocked to read that on average it has increased to about $3.70 per tooth !!
Upon delving deeper into this issue, it was explained that in some households kids really hit the jackpot--and as to be expected--these same children just happen to live in the wealthiest homes.
But what was really surprising about the Tooth Fairy's income distribution system, was that she also favors the molars of low educated and/or low income households, leaving these kids large cash deposits as well. It is assumed that in these homes, the Tooth Fairy wants the children to feel they are "keeping up" with their classmates financially. Meanwhile, highly educated households receive the least--about one buck per tooth. (Which made me feel better--as now I understand her 'logic' for leaving that piddly amount for our precious son).
It seems the poor Tooth Fairy has single handedly decided to close the income gap in this country, one baby tooth at a time. Now that we have discovered her quasi-socialist agenda, maybe it's time to call her out on this and agree on one reasonable amount for all kids?
Upon delving deeper into this issue, it was explained that in some households kids really hit the jackpot--and as to be expected--these same children just happen to live in the wealthiest homes.
But what was really surprising about the Tooth Fairy's income distribution system, was that she also favors the molars of low educated and/or low income households, leaving these kids large cash deposits as well. It is assumed that in these homes, the Tooth Fairy wants the children to feel they are "keeping up" with their classmates financially. Meanwhile, highly educated households receive the least--about one buck per tooth. (Which made me feel better--as now I understand her 'logic' for leaving that piddly amount for our precious son).
It seems the poor Tooth Fairy has single handedly decided to close the income gap in this country, one baby tooth at a time. Now that we have discovered her quasi-socialist agenda, maybe it's time to call her out on this and agree on one reasonable amount for all kids?
Monday, September 9, 2013
The Drone Dudes
Finally (!) I have found a right-wing extremist cause that makes sense to me. The crazy drone hunters. Basically the good folk out west are preparing to "hunt" them drones as they are released into the sky above...
Sure, their reasoning stems from the whole paranoid police state thing---which only overshadows the real issue: drones will be a complete and total menace to public safety.
One of the celebrated benefits of our drone filled future is that they will deliver pizza's right to your home! Imagine that, parachuting pizzas falling from the sky, ejected from a heavy remote controlled object-- operated by your local pizza delivery guy. What could go wrong? (And just think --they are talking about legalizing pot at about the same time)
Say goodbye to peaceful sunsets and bird watching, as your view and tranquility will be forever replaced by annoying flying contraptions. Not to mention the inevitable drone crashes, equipment failures, loose parts, bird collisions and all the other crazy things that will soon be falling from the sky.
Is anyone even paying attention to how many small aircraft crash on any given week? Now imagine those same events, in urban neighborhoods, but at lower altitudes with increased frequency!
As much as I am all for increased pizza consumption, I refuse to accept a society filled with dangerous robotic eyesores contributing to the national brain injury epidemic. For crying out loud, leave the remote controlled toys on the ground!
Sure, their reasoning stems from the whole paranoid police state thing---which only overshadows the real issue: drones will be a complete and total menace to public safety.
One of the celebrated benefits of our drone filled future is that they will deliver pizza's right to your home! Imagine that, parachuting pizzas falling from the sky, ejected from a heavy remote controlled object-- operated by your local pizza delivery guy. What could go wrong? (And just think --they are talking about legalizing pot at about the same time)
Say goodbye to peaceful sunsets and bird watching, as your view and tranquility will be forever replaced by annoying flying contraptions. Not to mention the inevitable drone crashes, equipment failures, loose parts, bird collisions and all the other crazy things that will soon be falling from the sky.
Is anyone even paying attention to how many small aircraft crash on any given week? Now imagine those same events, in urban neighborhoods, but at lower altitudes with increased frequency!
As much as I am all for increased pizza consumption, I refuse to accept a society filled with dangerous robotic eyesores contributing to the national brain injury epidemic. For crying out loud, leave the remote controlled toys on the ground!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
