Dirty Money Anyone??

The term money laundering usually pertains to corruption and fake bank accounts, never taking into the account the more necessary form of money laundering: the kind that involves Tide and a giant washing machine...
Am I really the only one who feels completely violated every time a cashier hands me a dark, wrinkled, soft, slightly torn dollar bill?? In my household we even have a name for these overused greenbacks: skank dollars. Nobody really wants to touch the skank dollar, as it has quite obviously been to more seedy destinations than I want to go.
Every crease and stain conjures images of red eyed folks rolling joints, snorting coke and sticking good old George Washington into strippers G-strings....Not to mention all the sneezing, coughing, nose blowing and masturbation I assume average folks participate in daily. (without washing their hands afterwards.)
But nobody bats an eye as they reach into their lint and booger filled pockets to pull out one more wrinkly dollar. Immediately passed on to me, without so much of a reprieve for the germs to die off. And I'm not even being that paranoid here---science has proven that paper money contains more viruses, bacteria, dirt and drugs than anyone could imagine.
So for now I use my debit card, but when I am handed an unsavory example of a scandalized bill, I may just wash it in a pool of alcohol before handing it on....