Here's a topic I am sure appeals to almost nobody at all: but I am totally into it!
What's with the long-held misconceptions and beliefs surrounding a hen's laying song?!
I am speaking about the sound (known to country chicken types) as the "egg song"--a crazy squawking noise made by a hen caught up in the moment of her own egg laying.
When I first heard my own chickens producing said "song" I thought--well that's the sound of childbirth !!....But it's more rhythmic than that... akin to a poultry call of the wild (sounds like: squawk, squawk, squawk, squuuaaakkk!) The song is repeated quite a few times and freakishly loud--especially for a quiet neighborhood, that may or may not allow the harboring of poultry ;)
My trusty online chicken forums often discuss the "egg song" --usually in the context of someone's chicken getting ready to lay an egg...But my problem with this is--that the purpose of the song seems lost on folks. If you attempt to google "why the egg song" the most common answer is: "the chicken is proud of her egg, thus announces it". Now what kind of ass backwards Darwinism is that???
What animal "announces" their precious little baby-to-be to the predators of the world--especially an animal who's only means of defense seems to be "panic and run"..???
So I continued to cruise the internet for more info. I gathered the history of the chicken begins in the jungle (which makes sense--their noises are tropical sounding!) My own theory was that the "jungle chickens" try to locate their mate with said song (the chicken doesn't really know if her egg is fertilized or not, and may need his assistance as she begins her long brooding process). And sure enough, anecdotal stories point exactly to that--if you have a rooster at home, he will respond to the egg song! I even read accounts of the rooster arriving with cabbage in his beak to feed the laying hen after the "song" !! Now, if only this more reasonable reason for the egg song would become public knowledge!!!...I wouldn't need to hear about the "silly proud chickens" anymore!!
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Friday, August 29, 2014
Random List of Peeves
Maybe this is the weirdest little list of pet peeves ever. But probably not.
1- Yellow leaves. Not by you--but by me (here in Alaska). It's only August 28th and the freakin leaves are starting to change! Oh why???? Everyone else is still basking in summertime, but I have to watch the damn falling leaves...
2- Gangster pants. I don't know what it's called, but that weird thing young men do with their pants to make them look like they are falling off. Like tie their belts around their ass and hold them all awkwardly to show off their underwear. I used to think women were silly for wearing thongs to impress others, but this beats the thong for "most uncomfortable look". Why don't they just wear a metal corset or something if they want to be unable to walk?
3- Finger nails. Maybe I have too much keratin, but I just don't like them growing so fast.
1- Yellow leaves. Not by you--but by me (here in Alaska). It's only August 28th and the freakin leaves are starting to change! Oh why???? Everyone else is still basking in summertime, but I have to watch the damn falling leaves...
2- Gangster pants. I don't know what it's called, but that weird thing young men do with their pants to make them look like they are falling off. Like tie their belts around their ass and hold them all awkwardly to show off their underwear. I used to think women were silly for wearing thongs to impress others, but this beats the thong for "most uncomfortable look". Why don't they just wear a metal corset or something if they want to be unable to walk?
3- Finger nails. Maybe I have too much keratin, but I just don't like them growing so fast.
Thursday, July 31, 2014
The Surgeon General is a Maniac
In my household we have a word : "BIG SKIN"--our term for sneaky corporate dermatology and sunscreen tycoons. Now the surgeon general (who is a suspicious dermatologist) has gotten up on the 'sun will kill you' soap box...This is of course the same sun, that has sustained ALL LIFE ON EARTH for billions of years--yet now is apparently out to kill you.
So they say melanoma has increased three fold since the 1970's --well, wait a minute--isn't this about the same time we STOPPED covering ourselves in greasy Coppertone oils?? And replaced the oily sheen with sunblock ?
And you tell me--are we spending more time outdoors, or less???
But nobody (most of all "big skin") wants to add a bit of accuracy to the dialogue. Namely why would increased sunblock use lead to skin cancer?
Well, the answer is pretty simple--melanin (a tan!?) protects you from the harmful UV rays of the sun. Slow sun exposure prepares your body for UV, versus keeping yourself pale as a lab rat until you accidentally get stuck outside and burn like a piece of bacon. This is why skin cancer rates are actually higher in rainy Oregon , than in sunny Texas--because daily low level sun exposure is the best protection!! Secondly, studies show that sunblock wearers spend more time in the sun than they should. (because nature has this awesome way of protecting you--maybe you feel red, or uncomfortable and know you better get under the shade--how novel!) But when you are covered in globs of nasty toxic sunblock, all you are doing is blocking vitamin D!! Yet ironically allowing some harmful radiation in..
But no pimple popper MD wants to explain these obvious facts to the public.
I just can't believe the surgeon general refuses to articulate the true nature of the problem, nor cares about the health costs associated with vitamin D deficiency. Any evolutionary biologist can tell you, that white folks (once black) lost their pigment as they migrated North so they could absorb MORE sun, not less. But obviously dermatologists are (well meaning perhaps) but misguided creationists.
So they say melanoma has increased three fold since the 1970's --well, wait a minute--isn't this about the same time we STOPPED covering ourselves in greasy Coppertone oils?? And replaced the oily sheen with sunblock ?
And you tell me--are we spending more time outdoors, or less???
But nobody (most of all "big skin") wants to add a bit of accuracy to the dialogue. Namely why would increased sunblock use lead to skin cancer?
Well, the answer is pretty simple--melanin (a tan!?) protects you from the harmful UV rays of the sun. Slow sun exposure prepares your body for UV, versus keeping yourself pale as a lab rat until you accidentally get stuck outside and burn like a piece of bacon. This is why skin cancer rates are actually higher in rainy Oregon , than in sunny Texas--because daily low level sun exposure is the best protection!! Secondly, studies show that sunblock wearers spend more time in the sun than they should. (because nature has this awesome way of protecting you--maybe you feel red, or uncomfortable and know you better get under the shade--how novel!) But when you are covered in globs of nasty toxic sunblock, all you are doing is blocking vitamin D!! Yet ironically allowing some harmful radiation in..
But no pimple popper MD wants to explain these obvious facts to the public.
I just can't believe the surgeon general refuses to articulate the true nature of the problem, nor cares about the health costs associated with vitamin D deficiency. Any evolutionary biologist can tell you, that white folks (once black) lost their pigment as they migrated North so they could absorb MORE sun, not less. But obviously dermatologists are (well meaning perhaps) but misguided creationists.
Thursday, July 24, 2014
Try Something New
As I was reading a CityData forum the other day, I came upon an irritated comment by a poster stating: "why does everyone pick on box stores and chain restaurants? I happen to like box stores and will happily live in a community with lots of them."
This statement shocked me.
I looked away from the screen, as this required serious contemplation.
Shopping at Sam's club or Walmart because of financial need is completely understandable--but to actually "like" them??? I thought that the only sane reason people went to Applebees, Lowes, or PetCo, was because IT WAS THERE.
And so I came to realize, that many towns look exactly like "everywhere else in America", because certain people actually want it that way!!! And is it merrily a coincidence that these same areas happen to have more conservative residents??
Yet (no surprise here): independent book stores, sea-weed cupcake shops and Cambodian craft brew cafe's are fairly good indicators of a progressive community....
Some people can be classified as either "avoiders" or "seekers". Avoiders can't stand change, cling to familiarity, repetition and routine. Perhaps the kind of people who would appreciate the safety and familiarity of a box store or chain restaurant?
Avoiding new experiences might seem safe and all, BUT lucky for our human history--some had the gall to seek out novelty and actually leave the cave....!
This statement shocked me.
I looked away from the screen, as this required serious contemplation.
Shopping at Sam's club or Walmart because of financial need is completely understandable--but to actually "like" them??? I thought that the only sane reason people went to Applebees, Lowes, or PetCo, was because IT WAS THERE.
And so I came to realize, that many towns look exactly like "everywhere else in America", because certain people actually want it that way!!! And is it merrily a coincidence that these same areas happen to have more conservative residents??
Yet (no surprise here): independent book stores, sea-weed cupcake shops and Cambodian craft brew cafe's are fairly good indicators of a progressive community....
Some people can be classified as either "avoiders" or "seekers". Avoiders can't stand change, cling to familiarity, repetition and routine. Perhaps the kind of people who would appreciate the safety and familiarity of a box store or chain restaurant?
Avoiding new experiences might seem safe and all, BUT lucky for our human history--some had the gall to seek out novelty and actually leave the cave....!
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Chasing Chickens
Thanks to all you folks in the Lower 48, (who so graciously have accepted the bad weather usually headed for Alaska) we Northerners have been engulfed in a beautiful (yet dusty) streak of blue skies, sunshine and 70 degrees for almost two weeks now...!
Gloating aside, the sun has played a productive part in acclimating my chickens to the great outdoors. They did start to stink a bit inside the house, so I was glad to start relocating them to the backyard. The ridiculous part of this whole process is the disruption caused by our 2 crazy dogs--who really, really want to eat said chickens....
The dogs bark like maniacs, dig under the fence, leap into the air--whatever they can do--just to get to those darn chickens! The only solution (thus far)-- has been hiding the chickens in our laundry room, while the dogs are exercising in the yard.
This results in a daily creature shuffle--where each morning we box up the chickens, hide them, put the dogs out, bring the dogs back in, take the chickens out and put them in their chicken play pen for the day.
That being said, the process does not always go smoothly. The dogs are easily controlled with dog biscuits, but not so the poultry. I'm not sure most people recognize how well chickens can fly and how fast those thin, freaky legs can run!
No matter what I tell the chickens, their reaction is always the same --panic!
So each time I try to place them in their 'transport box", the first one jumps out and goes running, while I attempt to put the second one in. So most mornings I get a good dose of cardio exercise by chasing a really fast, little chicken through the yard...Lucky for me, she usually turns around at some point and calls to chicken #2, as they truly only feel safe when they are together. When chicken #2 returns chirps, chicken #1 runs back to her and I finally have both in the box. I put them in their pen, feed them and retreat until evening, when the whole chicken chasing escapade will repeat itself.
I can certainly say, that this is not an efficient manner of poultry management. It is however, a great way to get in some human exercise...
Gloating aside, the sun has played a productive part in acclimating my chickens to the great outdoors. They did start to stink a bit inside the house, so I was glad to start relocating them to the backyard. The ridiculous part of this whole process is the disruption caused by our 2 crazy dogs--who really, really want to eat said chickens....
The dogs bark like maniacs, dig under the fence, leap into the air--whatever they can do--just to get to those darn chickens! The only solution (thus far)-- has been hiding the chickens in our laundry room, while the dogs are exercising in the yard.
This results in a daily creature shuffle--where each morning we box up the chickens, hide them, put the dogs out, bring the dogs back in, take the chickens out and put them in their chicken play pen for the day.
That being said, the process does not always go smoothly. The dogs are easily controlled with dog biscuits, but not so the poultry. I'm not sure most people recognize how well chickens can fly and how fast those thin, freaky legs can run!
No matter what I tell the chickens, their reaction is always the same --panic!
So each time I try to place them in their 'transport box", the first one jumps out and goes running, while I attempt to put the second one in. So most mornings I get a good dose of cardio exercise by chasing a really fast, little chicken through the yard...Lucky for me, she usually turns around at some point and calls to chicken #2, as they truly only feel safe when they are together. When chicken #2 returns chirps, chicken #1 runs back to her and I finally have both in the box. I put them in their pen, feed them and retreat until evening, when the whole chicken chasing escapade will repeat itself.
I can certainly say, that this is not an efficient manner of poultry management. It is however, a great way to get in some human exercise...
Friday, April 25, 2014
The Right Wing's Wildlife is Called Cheeseburger
I have been following the story of the crazed Nevada rancher, who along with a gang of armed militia buddies, pulled off a good-ole-fashioned standoff against the Federal Bureau of Land Management....
Apparently, it all began with this rancher feeling he had a so-called "right" to graze cattle for free on leased federal land. He felt the sage brush out there in Nevada wasn't worth much anyway, so why not squat your cattle there?? Wherein the second predicament appeared, as someone actually thought the land was worth more than cattle manure. The BLM wasn't only annoyed that this rancher wasn't paying his grazing fees, the area was also declared important habitat for the desert tortoise.
Now that's the kind of "important" i.e. endangered species act, that makes conservatives shit kittens. Over and over, I have heard politicians say (I live in red state Alaska after all) how there "should be no EPA, no Endangered species act," blah, blah, blah" it's all "government overreach".
Somehow, in their bizzaro bubble, the global population is not ballooning. Their brilliant plan is to pretend that "it's all the same as it was 200 years ago" and just graze over, plant over, build up and raze over every open space and wilderness area, all while assuming that the earth will magically EXPAND to produce more natural resources later on.
So either they believe that the endangered animals trampled to death, over-fished, or squeezed out of habitat...will return to earth via some magic ark, or the conservatives idea of American wildlife is the hamburger. Let's just replace the bald eagle with the Big Mac and call it a day.
Apparently, it all began with this rancher feeling he had a so-called "right" to graze cattle for free on leased federal land. He felt the sage brush out there in Nevada wasn't worth much anyway, so why not squat your cattle there?? Wherein the second predicament appeared, as someone actually thought the land was worth more than cattle manure. The BLM wasn't only annoyed that this rancher wasn't paying his grazing fees, the area was also declared important habitat for the desert tortoise.
Now that's the kind of "important" i.e. endangered species act, that makes conservatives shit kittens. Over and over, I have heard politicians say (I live in red state Alaska after all) how there "should be no EPA, no Endangered species act," blah, blah, blah" it's all "government overreach".
Somehow, in their bizzaro bubble, the global population is not ballooning. Their brilliant plan is to pretend that "it's all the same as it was 200 years ago" and just graze over, plant over, build up and raze over every open space and wilderness area, all while assuming that the earth will magically EXPAND to produce more natural resources later on.
So either they believe that the endangered animals trampled to death, over-fished, or squeezed out of habitat...will return to earth via some magic ark, or the conservatives idea of American wildlife is the hamburger. Let's just replace the bald eagle with the Big Mac and call it a day.
Thursday, April 24, 2014
51 and Alaskan
I am totally not making fun of 51 year olds, nor do I have a list of funny Alaskans. What I care to vent about is the temperature 51 (Fahrenheit)--and what it does in Alaska...(!)
Truthfully-- it is a glorious thing, if it's 51 outside in April--it must be sunny and warm. BUT 'Alaska' warm that is. In Hawaii they call 51 "frigid".
Which brings me to the annoying part, because you see--I am currently thinking like the Islanders. 51 is nice enough and all, but with a breeze out--I didn't find it patio pleasant. So from the safety of my vehicle, I watched all those darn acclimated Northerners. (which hasn't happened to me after all these years--instead, I have developed some sort of snow allergy--which is real--you can google it.)
How many people did I see outside today in flippin shorts?? There were all those kids getting off the school bus, and joggers, and at least three ladies walking their dogs. Not to mention all the people in flip-flops. Flip flops and shorts, at the grocery store--and it is 51 out. That's why when it reaches 70 degrees here, people fall over in a tizzy, buy out the ice cream and dive into the river.
Truthfully-- it is a glorious thing, if it's 51 outside in April--it must be sunny and warm. BUT 'Alaska' warm that is. In Hawaii they call 51 "frigid".
Which brings me to the annoying part, because you see--I am currently thinking like the Islanders. 51 is nice enough and all, but with a breeze out--I didn't find it patio pleasant. So from the safety of my vehicle, I watched all those darn acclimated Northerners. (which hasn't happened to me after all these years--instead, I have developed some sort of snow allergy--which is real--you can google it.)
How many people did I see outside today in flippin shorts?? There were all those kids getting off the school bus, and joggers, and at least three ladies walking their dogs. Not to mention all the people in flip-flops. Flip flops and shorts, at the grocery store--and it is 51 out. That's why when it reaches 70 degrees here, people fall over in a tizzy, buy out the ice cream and dive into the river.
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